One of those weeks

where I'm just in a funky schlump. One of my favorite blogger's Kelle spoke earlier in the week about Grays and Colors, and it spoke to me.  As the type of person who has the positive outlook through most things in our life this week has taken me to a dark place.

I've mentioned before about the Hubs layoffs, he's a carpenter for our local union and in just this calendar year he's worked for maybe 3 months.  Needless to say this has been a huge stress.  So we've been looking into options of him going into business for himself, but that takes some start up money so we're hoping to launch that in the new year, but right now in the here we're dealing with another recent layoff as of yesterday.  I'm so over there "not being work".

So this week I pretty much burrowed into my little hole and had my freak out over it all, but now I'm ready to lift my head back up and push forward.  As I know there has to be something better just around the corner!

Speaking of around the corner - anyone else not ready for the Christmas barrage of things yet?!  I honestly LOVE this time of year but I'm freaking out a little seeing friends on FB post pics of their kids with Santa - I mean really - we're not even into a whole week of November yet!  That's another thing I'm looking forward to being bitten with the seasonal goodness.

More than just a Mommy

Lately, I've been reflecting on my life and what exactly I'm doing with myself.  I've been feeling down about myself and a little lost.  And I realized that I've let myself become consumed with our girls', home, and the Hubs, somehow after Avalynn arrived I was put on the back burner turned on warm and forgotten about.  But this mama has decided I'm important enough to make a priority on my long "to-do" list.

I'm starting slow adding in changes here and there.  The first thing I added was exercise. I am on my 3rd week of working out.  It actually does make me feel better and more energized throughout the day.  The second & third things I started this week, second is to paint my fingernails.  Hoping to change the polish twice a week (I can do this when watching our shows at night).  And the third is to get dressed and accessorize.  I've gotten in the habit of sweat type capri's and shorts & tshirts everyday of the week.  Funny thing - I always swore I wouldn't become one of those mom's.  But I have, anyways - past two days have been such a nice change in actually dressing, mixing and matching "dressy" items.

I have some more changes I want to implement and I'll be back to update on the progress of adding myself back into the mix of life and priorities.

I

I am. . . a mother above anything else.
I want. . .to drive somewhere beautiful, get lost, windows down, music blaring, and pull over to watch the sunset.
I have. . . a pretty good life.
I keep. . . little things from whatever special stuff we do with Emma.
I wish I could. . . let loose sometimes.
I hate. . .that I've lost sight of some things in life.
I fear. . .failing Emma.
I hear. . .country music, an airplane.
I don't think. . . I'll ever become really organized with everything.
I regret. . .not following through with some of my dreams.
I love. . .turkey hill iced tea.
I am not. . . the greatest gardener.
I dance. . . in the kitchen with Emma.
I sing. . . to whatever is on.
I never. . . have mowed our lawn.
I rarely. . .get things done ahead of time...I'm the great procrastinator.
I cry when I watch. . .Emma do something new.
I am not always. . .the nicest person.
I hate that. . . I have minimal patience with some things.
I'm confused about. . . everyday stuff sometimes.
I need. . . a good girls' night out!
I should. . . be up in bed.
I hope . . .tomorrow night is a fun date night.